


Of Paralysis and Music

by chaoticrandomness



Series: 30 Day PMMM Ship Challenge Universe [1]
Category: Mahou Shoujo Madoka Magika | Puella Magi Madoka Magica
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-01
Updated: 2015-06-01
Packaged: 2018-04-02 06:40:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,681
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4050043
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chaoticrandomness/pseuds/chaoticrandomness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Written for day 2 of the 30 day PMMM ship challenge. In which I write something happy with Kamijou and Sayaka.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of Paralysis and Music

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ayanotateyuri](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ayanotateyuri/gifts).



  _You were so worried about seriously auditioning for the first time, and the judge was gushing about you. You're going to make it to the world's stage with your music._

 

"See! I told you you'd be amazing!" are the first words I hear as I exit the audition room. Sayaka's standing right by the door with my parents, and they're all smiling, finally removing the last bit of pressure on my shoulders. 

 

"I guess you were right on that point." I answer, as she begins to hug me. "Do you know when the results are going up?" 

 

"No, but the rooms aren't soundproofed for some reason and anyone with ears can tell that you're amazing, so you don't have to worry about that." she responds, as we exit the building and walk towards the car. 

 

_Well, the weather is determined to contradict how happy everyone is by being a gray mask of fog. It's not like fog would stop Sayaka from being energetic, though._

 

* * *

 

 

 

"....have you ever thought of having Hitomi accompany you?" Sayaka asks as it rains, puddles forming outside the car as droplets of water hit the ground, whose motion reminds me of the vibration of strings. 

 

"It's rare for a soloist to personally know the people accompanying them, and I'll-" I begin, before the car suddenly comes to a stop. Outside of the window, I see another car heading towards us like a bullet....

 

_No, it's not going to hit us, we're just stuck in traffic due to the rain or a tree falling or something.... we're not going to die in this car, and-_

 

BANG!

 

"I'll protect you, don't worry!" Sayaka exclaims, always determined to play the heroine even when we're stuck in a car and surrounded by a cacophony of honks and my parents' screams and bangs and shattered glass....

 

_I don't want you to die.... I don't want anyone to die, but I've managed to hit both the apex and abyss of my life in about an hour.... even if I live, I could still.... lose... everything...._

 

_Would you rather die right now or live, but lose your ability to play?_

 

* * *

 

 

I open my eyes to Sayaka standing over me in a white room, holding me in one hand and my violin in the other. 

 

"So is this the part of the story where the brave knight awakens the fair maiden from her slumber?" I quip, trying to distract myself form the crash and how long I've been lying in a hospital bed, completely oblivious to everything around me...

 

"....heh. I suppose it is, but I didn't kiss you. Sorry...." she answers, attempting to smile, but it looks like she's holding back tears..... 

 

_Should I.... ask her what happened to me? Would it just make her feel worse if I did?_

 

Thankfully, a nurse walks into the room, tells me that Sayaka and I have been here for the past three days, my parents and the other driver are dead, and that I appear to have lost all use of my lower limbs. 

 

_....at least it wasn't your hands. Be glad for that.... be glad that you're not fully dead. And Sayaka's alive and unharmed and still in a state to play the heroine with everyone._

 

Water stains my face, and I'm not sure who the tears are from. 

 

* * *

 

 

I leave the hospital a week later in a wheelchair and with gray hair. Sayaka says that it makes me look incredibly mature, but all I see is loss. 

 

_Try to be positive. At least.... um, this gives you more opportunities to spend time with her? That's something...._

 

Upon Sayaka's insistence, I've moved in with her family. Granted, we've been close since we were about five, but I don't see why she's taken it upon herself to become my full-time caretaker....

 

_She's a good person and wants to help people. Except I can't see her doing this with Madoka or Hitomi._

 

_But what makes me different from them? Why does she want to tie herself to me for the rest of my life and hold herself back?_

 

"Kyousuke, are you ready?" she asks, handing me my violin case. 

 

".....I guess....." I answer, as she guides me to the graveyard for the funeral. 

 

_Can someone be ready for their parents' deaths? Can anyone?_

 

_Just think of this as another concert. Except with dead people and in a wheelchair..... and_ _I would've liked to use a cello for this one. Or even a viola, for they're both lower and more melancholy...._

 

* * *

 

 

Somehow, the two of us fall into a routine. Sayaka helps me with everything that I used to be able to do when I had working lower limbs, and I.... do nothing for her. 

 

_There's no such thing as equivalent exchange in this world. One party is selfish and the other selfless.... and she wants to help everyone on this planet. Starting with one of her closest friends..._

 

_Yet.... she's basically bound her life to mine. Is it worth isolating her from Madoka and Hitomi.... just for me?_

 

_No, it isn't._

 

"You don't have to help me." I say, after she passes me another book in our studying. I've been granted an extension on everything, but I don't need them. I have enough time on my hands. 

 

"But I want to. Heroines save people, don't they? What's a better start to my career as a heroine of justice than the person I-" she answers, before dropping the book on my foot and staring at the floor. 

 

_The person she... whats?_

 

_Admires? Loves? Desires?_

 

_No, they're all in the past tense. She shouldn't waste her life on me._

 

"....um, anyways, could you explain hyperbolic functions and their foci again?" she asks, quickly changing the subject. 

 

* * *

 

 

"Do you.... ever wish that I was in your place, Kyousuke, and you were in mine?" she asks the day after all of our exams are done, and she's guiding me around the park. 

 

"Why are you even asking me this?" I answer, for I wouldn't wish my fate after the crash on anyone.  _Especially_ her. 

 

_You're.... too amazing, Sayaka, to spend the rest of your life dependent on others. And I don't know if I could take care of another person the way you do._

 

"Because.... compared to you, I'm nothing important. You were going to become some famous musician everyone's going to extol the virtues of centuries after you die, and I'm going to waste my life, for I'm just ordinary...." she rambles, and she's wrong, she's heroic and strong and selfless, and not many people would do what she did for me....

 

"Why was it you? Why did you lose all feeling in your legs and your family, when I got away from that crash losing absolutely nothing?! Why didn't I die or end up paralyzed instead of you? You were going to perform in Europe this summer after they fast-tracked you into the soloist's position, and I'm not lying, I saw the results. Instead, you're stuck in this chair, and.... I'm a reckless idiot who is somehow uninjured. God, why did it have to be you?!" she exclaims, as a trio of girls and a white cat turn towards us, and I want to play for her, do something to show that she's better than she thinks she is.... 

 

"If you were like the person you claimed to be, why did you give up your life to help me after the accident? We all have a reason to be alive.... Sayaka, you're going to become a heroine of justice someday, and-" I begin, before she grabs the handles of the chair and sprints to her house, collapsing onto me.

 

"....I'm not selfless.... I wanted you to love me, Kyousuke...." she answers, beginning to cry again. 

 

"Love is not a bad reason to do anything. There's nothing wrong with wanting me to love you." I answer, wrapping my arms around hers as we entwine ourselves together, connected in emotion and love.

 

* * *

 

 

"....I'm sorry for acting so weirdly yesterday, but I do love you, Kyousuke...." Sayaka says as I open my eyes to her sitting on my bed. 

 

"No, it's okay. Thank you for telling me about how you felt, Sayaka...." I answer, reaching for a pen and paper on my nearby desk. 

 

_I want to write a song for you, Sayaka. A song that'll do you justice.... and I want to perform again. I used to love playing for people, and the last time I performed was at a funeral...._

 

"So, we truly have reached the part where the knight wakes up his fair lady! Except genderbent...." she remarks, leaning in towards me and planting a kiss on my lips as I begin to write. 

 

_Thank you, Sayaka.... I really should've done more for you, you're amazing and I.... love you...._

 

* * *

 

 

There's a guitar and cello still lying in my old house. I wonder why I never brought them with me to Sayaka's.... never brought them home. 

 

"So, you want to teach me how to play? So I can accompany you?" she asks, as I take the guitar from her hands. 

 

"Since you've done so much for me, I should do something for you. And since we're kind of stuck with each other, we might as well develop a partnership in this area." I answer, pulling out some sheet music. 

 

"I was doing what any good person would've done, and you already helped me with school stuff." she says, picking up the cello and raising the stand. 

 

"Don't sell yourself short, Sayaka. And I didn't want to see the cello go to waste, as I doubt that I could use it in my current situation." I respond, as she unzips the case and places the cello between her legs. 

 

"Well, you do know how to hold it, so that's good. Shall we begin with how to play and read bass clef, Sayaka?" I ask, placing the music on her stand. 

 

"I'd be delighted to, Kyousuke." she answers, leaning over the stand and kissing me, ready to begin our musical partnership. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I have no idea why I like this ship, but I do.


End file.
